Old me vs Devine


Where should I begin
At times I wasn’t my own friend
I use to cry  cause I was sad
I use lie cause I was mad
But in most conversation I was
Totally mad at my dad cause of the stuff he said and did
but in reality I didnt realize I was grown not a kid
I was in my own world and train of thought
cause of the stress people brought
But growing up as a boy a man was something I was never taught
Only that lying was a greatful flaw.
But holding my tongue and squeezing my jaws.
Work in long hours  to skip lunch and dinner
Just to by pass fights and night and hurt feelings
And everybody feeling so up tight.
I was screaming for help for a while
Even after all three of kids
Year by year would pass
I would cry and think of solutions
But all the time my mind was clear but polluted
Thinking of ways to get rid of high bills
And working hard but stress and lifting heavy things my body it kills
But never told anyone how I feel
I dodged going back to school
Cause I was afraid of who wouldn’t think I was cool
Never broke laws but was breaking all  the rules.
Never did I have to push to go further than the front door
I was ok but to some i lived poor
But I had to close that door…..
Now I’m Devine
Smiling all the time
Heart is ready for love
Let everything go and start living
And felt happy about believing in myself
It feels good to go back to school
Learn more knowledge so people stop taking me as a fool
Tell where would I be without God
I’m comfortable with me and who I am
Not embarrass but can embrace life by it meaning
My heart is light just needed a little cleaning
Have real friends not the ones that was draining me
Lord you heard me in the mist of the river I was drowning
But you grab me and your wing surrounded me with protection
Now I’m learning how to think so it will not be any more more corrections
But yet let it be life and all Its projections
You gave me a new path
A new love over kindness and gifts
I can now walk away smiling from that cliff
Enjoying my new ways and leave behind that  dark cave
My life God u did save
I give you all the praise………


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